For the love of parents

Today a parent came in to chat with me after school...

mind you- I've had both great (we love you!) and hideous (it's your fault he's getting an F!) experiences with this so I was a little nervous.

She was a parent I'd never met before and turns out I have two of her kids, one in 7th and one in 9th.

The 7th grader is a pretty normal boy, just chill and a great student but I've never had trouble with him.

The 9th grade girl is a different story. She's your classic, closet creator.

The kind that shows her personality to no one but her journal,
has very few if any friends at school
and rarely, if ever, speaks.

She is absolutely vibrant on paper, beautiful, poignant thoughts and an attitude! She has very specific opinions and will not be swayed by classmates. But she also won't talk to them about it either-she just is the way she is. She LOVES the Twilight series, and is an avid reader as far as I could tell.

Her mother comes in, we talk about the boy, then she says "but really I want to talk about *girl*"

She procedes to tell me how much of a difference I've made in her daughter's life. That I've fueled her (very recent) budding love of reading. I've encouraged her in her writing and built her confidence. And that she loves me as a teacher, and my class is one of the only reasons she likes to come to school.

Teary eyed and sniffling, she said that I had made a difference.

{after a week of parents questioning my book choices, finalizing term grades, screaming/anxious kids ready for spring break, whiny teachers,  and a myriad of sundry issues, I realized this,}

It's all worth it. Every five weeks of torture is worth 5 minutes of a parent telling you that you are loved by their kid.

Maybe I do love this job after all.

Da Boinjamin

here's the deal

Benjamin is...

• in a million difficult classes including some version of 
• chemistry, 
• physics, 
• physiology, 
• and some other sumthin sumthin this term plus two labs
• studying for the MCAT in ALL his extra time- including but not limited to, in the car, on his walk to school, and whenever he looks at the bathroom mirror (he's written some nice equations there for me to learn whilst applying makeup...)
• taking a killer MCAT class two days a week three hours each in Orem
• attempting to stay fit by going swimming at 6 am, or
• to the gym in the evenings

...but he was late to MCAT class tonight because he dreaded the thought of me coming home to dirty dishes.

I've married an angel. 

Teaching is hard

Can I just tell you that my job is hard?
Not always in the--demanding, busy, hectic--way, but in other ways.

1. Emotional toll- last night i worried and fretted all evening about one of my students who is feeling depressed and having some emotional crapola going on. It seriously knotted up my guts! I feel like these kids are mine! My life! Heaven knows I can't stand them some days, but I'm really going to miss their crazy ideas, dreams, stories and laughs after school ends.

2. The loudness- I've never heard so much noise in my entire life....and I've been to several concerts and not been able to hear the next day. Maybe it's the shrillness of their tiny voices....?

3. The energy zap- I'm completely devoid of all energy when the day is done. Even (almost especially) on the days when the kids mostly conduct their own class, or work days. I just feel like I got hit by a bus, then flipped over it, fell off the back and landed on another friendly vehicle. I end up looking like this...

All this is fine and dandy but in the end, I do love my kids, I love being here every day and being a part of their lives. I love laughing with them (they think I'm funny!) and crying with them. I love their hairbrained ideas that lead to amazing projects, and I love their humanness.

Adults get less and less human, and less and less honest. Kids are always honest. It's safe to say I fit better here than in the real world. I'll just have to get over the hard stuff.

Bedsprings

Sometimes, during that time of the month, I cry. Alot.

Usually it's at a sweet commercial, a tender email, or a touching rap song.....

But sometimes it's because my husband wants to sell our bed springs that make our bed 4 1/2 feet tall 

You don't understand! That bed is my cloud of heavenly goodness! I can lay there and see NOTHING! It's like a floating pool of softness where no students, friends, family, or other "life" things are allowed. That is where I sit and chat with Ben when he comes home and he gives me giant monster hugs and I can actually reach him! It is my piece of heaven and I was consequently devastated that the bedsprings were leaving.

Ben took them off so I could see how it felt.

I laid there, rolled around, blew my nose a bit.

Made him put them back on.

Then I cried, for an hour, over bedsprings.

I was forced to text the girl who bought them that I was too emotionally attached to my bed springs to let them leave my sight.

So thank you PMS- You saved my bedsprings. All is right with the world.

Birth Month

February is the maddest, craziest month. I love it.

First we have Ben's Birthday. We played all day, xcountry skied, ate delicious foods and played with family. He really is the darlingest boy I've ever met and I'm SO  grateful that he was born just in time for me! I'm pretty sure we couldn't wait to be together, that's why we're only 8 days apart!

Fancy cheeses at The Copper Onion!

It was a family affair

Then we have Valentin's day. This could possibly be the best Valentine's day I've ever had....ever. That'a a big deal yo! The day started out quietly until I realized (per text) that ben had snuck a valentine in my purse. A massage!!! A MASSAGE PEOPLE! best valentine ever! So I have yet to take advantage of my gift in SLC but it's in the works! The day was already won when, during lunch, I got called down to the office. And there, my dream come true, was a beautiful bouquet of roses and red carnations that was lovely! I was so happy! I squealed inside like a little girl! They are still sitting on my desk, even though all the roses have died (I threw them away don't worry). ANyway, the flowers we'rent even the best part! It also came with the sweetest note from the love of my life that made me almost cry and have to go into the hallway to call Ben because I was so excited :) ah, great day. Oh yes, then of course we went to Bombay House for dinner  and had all the delicious foods we could stuff in our mouths! WE had the best time chatting and laughing and eating. One of my favorite days so far I think!

Lastly cam my Birthday. More on that later. I'm pooped.

Brave People

I've never been surrounded by so many brave people in my life. I probably cry on a daily basis because it's overwhelming! So many brave people and kind and amazing.

My Husband's aunt is a new foster mom of three siblings and every time I read her blog I get teary- she is amazing! She claims to gain all this strength from those around her but it's so obvious that she is the one who is wowing everyone. I cannot even imagine the love that woman emanates. Sheesh!

My sister is having a baby...like tomorrow.....I just barely got up the courage to pay for a dog that's not eve born yet! ( I know, get over it people, i'm getting a puppy instead of a baby). She is so ready for this baby to come! That girl can love a baby no matter whose or where it's from--her capacity for love is massive. She has all the cribs and bouncing things and onezies and I'm so impressed that she is so calm. I'm sure she's scared to death inside but I'm still ridiculously impressed.

Ben. If there was a braver person I'd like to meet them. This boy goes to class everyday, comes home, takes care of me (usually does the dishes since I despise it) goes to some ridiculous 3 hour MCAT class then comes home to do homework. He never stops! And really he never complains! I'm absolutely obsessed with him....I can't believe he would sacrifice so much time and energy just so that he can get into medical school and provide for us. He's too amazing, I'm a lucky girl.


just wow. I don't even have anything artistic or beautiful to say because I can't even think straight. These people are inspiring and beautiful and someday I wish to be so bold and so brave.

PUPPY ALERT!!!

Good news everyone. My puppy may or may not be brewing!!!

RIGHT NOW!

HOly Hannah I can hardly contain  myself. I seriously have wanted this puppy for a year now and I've just been waiting patiently! The breeder emailed me that the mom bred last week and hopefully she'll be pregnant! That means she should have the baby at the beginning of April and I should have my puppy at the end of May!!!

HOO-RAH!

seriously. I'm excited.

Dogs are only pregnant for two months, which is fantastical, then they need to be with their mommy for another 6-9 weeks. So I'm hoping to get her after I get out of school and we move back to MI.

oh my heavenly days I"m thrilled. This puppy will not only be the death of me, cuteness wise, but it will also satisfy baby hunger for the time being :) YAY!

that is all. You are all dismissed.